Personal Growth
  • fr-FR
  • English (UK)


Then when you at your most vulnerable they resurrected into reasons and excuses that sabotage you from taking the next small step to create the life you keep saying you want to experience. They are only as powerful as your resistance. Your resistance is because no one told you they are not you and that you don't have to accept them. When you understand and accept they are echoes of how you have been conditioned and not your destiny you will shift your focus from resistance to daily action that moves you toward your dreams.

Taking charge of your unconscious means you need to stay mindfully aware that what is stopping you lives in you. It is not you. Only you can change it. You can blame it on your parents, your spouse or significant other, your children, the economy or what phase the moon is in. You can even blame it on yourself. The problem with blame is that is keeps you stuck in where you don't want to be. Blame disempowers you from taking action. Blame is like quick sand you sink slowly until it drowns you. So blaming others or your self is not the way to create the life you want to live.

Understanding the impact of your conditioning and loving yourself to a new way of being is the road of transformation. Transforming your life is not rocket science. Transforming your life is an act of creation in the face of past conditioning given to you from distorted thinking of others and your acceptance of their judgment on you when you were too vulnerable to know better. As Maya Angelou stated, "When we know better, we do better."

Life is the school house of the soul. We all have a lot to learn from each other and to teach each other. Transformation is an inner journey into your self. There you will find the good, the bad and the ugly. It all needs to be embraced. You can't change what you won't integrate. Transformation is the outcome of integrating. Integration is the journey into honoring your experiences, all of them. As you do you will find your humanity. In finding your humanity you will become more self-caring and other caring.

This journey is not for the faint of heart. It is the most courageous journey a human can make. It is the most frightening journey a human can take. It is the most important life shifting journey you will ever experience. It is a journey into an unlimited world. It is a journey to save one's self. It is a journey that leads to spiritual awakening and living from a love-based place and partnership living. It is living from love and understanding fear.

Deborah Chelette-Wilson is a relationship coach, authoress and speaker whose powerful message for women is "It's time to stop waiting for permission to be all that we can be(without being a bitch about it)." Her inspiring message helps women harness their personal power, find peace within and become part of the shift in creating healthier and more loving relationships, beginning with the one with their self. In order to honor someone else's heart you must first honor your own.